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Yearly Archives: 2010
Day 9/10 – The Three A.M. Egos
11/11/10 – 12:51
My last date was in Sowerby Bridge, West Yorkshire. We’d stayed the night before in Preston, with Mark’s parents. We got crumpets and bacon and eggs and tea and ginger nuts. I mentioned I couldn’t get Ginger Nuts in Holland and so, the next morning, his Mum picked me up a double pack from ASDA. [...]
Day 8 – The Screenplay (Opening Page)
9/11/10 – 14:55
ON THE ROAD
AN ORIGINAL SCREENPLAY
BY
JAMIE DOBSON
CHARACTERS:
MARK COLEMAN
COLD, MOODY, WITH A GINGER BEARD AND BUSINESS-LIKE. MARK IS IN HIS LATE 20S, WAS BORN IN PRESTON, NORTH ENGLAND, GRADUATED IN MATHEMATICS BEFORE GETTING CAUGHT IN A JOB SO BAD THEY HAD TO PAY HIM VAST AMOUNTS OF MONEY TO DO IT. IN A QUARTER-LIFE CRISIS HE QUITS [...]
Day 7 – This Is The Verse
8/11/10 – 17:47
8th of November, 2010, 14:02, Glasgow.
They say that during the siege of Stalingrad, the heavy ones died first. Or, as Peter put it, ‘the smack-heads were the last to drop’. In the armies, only the horses were fed by weight. Last night, at the gig, I fell asleep on a chair. [...]
Day 6 – Glass, Go Away You Child
7/11/10 – 19:46
7th of November, 2010, 16:57
We are in an apartment, now, in Glasgow. The trip over took us over the Firth of Forth bridge, an engineering wonder, and into a small village called Glenfarg, where we had a Sunday roast for brunch. The Glenfarg hotel was on the same road as a decrepit, shell [...]
Night 5 – We’re Jamming
7/11/10 – 1:26
23:25
Here we are, sat around Vanessa’s table somewhere in a flat in the nicer part of Edinburgh. Mark, to my right, is playing a banjo. To my left, Vanessa is doing the same. Signe is playing acoustic and singing. Peter’s head is lulling in silent comprehension. Steph is playing a [...]
Day 5 – Cold
6/11/10 – 19:30
6th November, 2010, 11:??.
The good thing about gigs getting cancelled or just having a day off is that you get to hang out, wind each other up, coerce each other into behaving, into hurrying up, drinking up and shutting up.
We have an extra day in Edinburgh today and will be moving onto Glasgow today or [...]
Day 4 – Penny For The Guys
5/11/10 – 20:28
5th of November, 2010, 17:51. Edinburgh.
The artist and the entrepreneur are not similar. They are the same. They are superficially childish; they reject the mothering of structure and routine, and the comforts and predictability that go with it, and instead choose to feel more fully. Process – from religious ceremony to [...]
Day 3 – Scotland’s Shite
4/11/10 – 17:27
4th of November, 2010, 15:22 (there is no sun at my window).
This day started last night, at three o’clock in the morning. It seems, even at this early stage in the tour, that touring is about recovering and catching naps and calories at every free moment. I can’t say I like it too [...]
Day 3.1 – Leeds
4/11/10 – 5:47
It’s 3.30 and we are up because Mark has to get to Leeds airport. It’s a mild morning and a light night; no clouds and lots of stars.
We had fish and Chips last night but Peter opened his up and changed his mind. Mark and Steph had curry. She mugged Nick Tilsley in Coronation [...]
Day 2 – Re-Turn
3/11/10 – 20:34
Wednesday, 3 November 2010, 11:31
We met accidentally in the street as I was walking to the club. We said hello and then Peter rooted in the back of the car for a bottle of Jameson’s and some merchandise. He then said, ‘it would be great if you could get me some weed’. [...]
Day 1 – Go To Hull
2/11/10 – 19:59
Tuesday, 2 November 2010, 14:39
The room I am in is lit by eight lights each with two fluorescent strips. My mate Andy told me that the light sabre battles in Star Wars were fought using them and that they’d have to cut, sweep up, and start again for every new strike. A Turkish [...]
Day 8 – Knob Dogs
6/10/10 – 11:42
[About 8 a.m..]
When I ran on Monday, I noticed a pack of wild dogs appear from the camouflage, and therefore they looked like they appeared from nowhere. [Two of them,] a copper dog and copper and white dog, they looked like brothers, followed me out today, breaking step to chase a bird on the [...]
Day 7 – The Knicker Shit
5/10/10 – 17:58
[About three in the afternoon]
I’m drinking coke now like that bloke who put his wife in the swimming pool in Cocoon after she was dead. We’ve got the shits. We were coked out yesterday, both with sugary, ‘clacky’, mouths. (With this in mind, you might be surprised how little alcohol has to [...]
Day 6 – Rod Almighty!
4/10/10 – 10:32
20th September, early.
I finally got out for a run today, the 1/2 marathon is in 4 weeks and I am woefully under prepared. This morning I had to drag myself up and down the beach.
Tagazout continues to reveal herself to me. The road in from Agadir runs along the back of the beach. [...]
Day 5 – A Fight to the Death
4/10/10 – 10:25
19th of September, about 17:30.
Last night I slept on the couch. My sickness was reaching some kind of head-achey climax. I couldn’t get off the couch so Andrea left me there. I woke early and finally refreshed. [I am sure my earlier dreams where related to my exhaustion.] Andrea slept [...]
Dear God
3/10/10 – 11:57
It’s been a boring weekend, although I did get tear gassed on Friday. A new law came into effect allowing local councils to clear squats out. They do this, so I am told, by raising up a cage full of riot cops who then fly through the top window clearing out the squatters one room, [...]
Day 4 – Withdraw
2/10/10 – 16:08
18th of September, 2010, 12/13:??, Agadir.
We finally got moving at about 11. We parked up the other end of the seafront and walked down. Within yards we encountered a beggar who looked like she’d urinated against the car she was squatting against. Moments later, we came across a Thomas Cook hotel and just sauntered in, [...]
Day 3 – Full of Broken Thoughts
1/10/10 – 9:35
Friday the 17th of September, 2010, 7:35.
When I went to bed I was transported to Stalingrad. This I could handle. Waking up, however, was scary. I was in a house on Beverley road, one of those posh ones. It was much too big. My ex came in, a guest of a friend of a friend, [...]
Day 2 – Agadear-Dear, Dear, Push Pineapple Shake The Tree.
30/9/10 – 14:10
Thursday, 16th of September, 2010, 16:00.
Our flight in yesterday was more or less fine, but the landing in Marrakech v. heavy and the hop to Agadir rocky. The queue at immigration was stubby, the visitors formed a square behind 5 or 7 open booths. All names were recorded by hand. This was the first clue [...]
Degrees of Knowing
29/9/10 – 18:59
I just got back from a short run. It was hard. Please check this out for the details of last week.
*
I am thoroughly enjoying Welsh’s Trainspotting. He wrote it, I am led to believe, here in Amsterdam. Distance lends enhancement, so sang Jonathan Fucking Pryce, in Evita, the dos cunt. [...]
Day 1 – Of Things To Come
29/9/10 – 10:47
Wednesday the 16th, I think, 2010, 14:0?, Schiphol.
I woke up today thinking, ‘I can’t wait to sleep in Morocco’. So, here we are then, on the road again, getting ready to create a slither of separation anxiety between us and Amsterdam in the hope that we’ll appreciate her again. That and some sun [...]
What Next?
4/9/10 – 17:18
I think that Boy is a lesson in economic writing. It’s certainly a challenge for the writer to try and say as much as they can in as little words as possible. Dahl, in a few pages, is able to paint a picture of his father. In a few chapters, to remind [...]
Oh Boy!
4/9/10 – 13:06
About ten or twelve weeks ago, I was sick. It was what my mum would call a baddy. I got a sickly feeling, muscle pain, and soreness through my testicles – I hate the testicle ache. I thought, hurry up then, but there is no rushing these viruses and it took a [...]
Dear Simon…
29/8/10 – 11:05
Simon, in response to your comment.
In 140 Characters
4 th rdo shw we hve a ftre tuesdy tries & i sd lts do a hlf-mrthn, I sd ny cnt cn rn a hlf-mrthn ts a pce of pss. Nw we r trng & tryng 2 gt ft & rn am*dam mrthn in oct.
Radio Show
Simon, as [...]
Oh fuck….
27/8/10 – 11:31
It was all going so well. The runs were feeling better, we were going faster, we were running for longer. Last night all that changed.
I was cruising through my second lap of the Vondelpark when something changed in my lower right back, just a touch above my bum near the middle. I walked for a [...]
What Have I Done?
26/8/10 – 21:04
I worked hard today, all week actually, and in between the gaps ran about 30 kms. I picked Andrea up from work, her last day, had a few wines then ate a pack of crisps. A 150 gram pack. I turned it over, there are 187 calories in 40 grams of these [...]
Getting There
24/8/10 – 20:11
In the beginning we had to run for 20 minutes, walk for 1, then run again. Then we had to do 25, 1, 25. We just chopped 30, 1, 30. Now, 60 minutes is 1/6 more time than 50 (obviously) but we did not travel more than a 1/6 extra… we did [...]
1000 Down, 42,000 To Go
22/8/10 – 20:53
My friends Hamish and Norma are in town from New Zealand. This trip back is their honeymoon. They arrived on Friday, which was my birthday. My day started with a nutty existential dream. I was at Gatwick with my friend James, I hushed him because I suspected one of my exes [...]
Am a Right Cunt Me
19/8/10 – 10:50
I was thinking, yesterday, as my fat fucking belly wobbled its way around the touch field, and later as I tucked into my dinner, a large portion of Surinamese Bami, what levels of austerity must one live to in order not be a fat little pudding? What do you have to do? What [...]
